Saturday, 17 October 2009

Israeli Limbo

So, several things are happening at the moment. Firstly, my suitcase didn't follow me to Israel, so I am on the family desktop.

Secondly, my parents are not coping particularly well. They were underplaying how much pain my father has been in since they fiddled with his insides on Thursday last week. My mother is trying to give him different cocktails of drugs to help with this, but this means that no one but her can really help to care for him.

My mother says that my grandmother has become unbearable since they arrived in Israel. I told her that I would go and babysit, but that I feel like I am more useful at my parent's house right now.

Otherwise, the place has become like the train station that my grandmother's was when I was over there. My mother has no help and is therefore constantly offering coffee, cake and meals and then washing up after everyone, in between small talk. She is really hating it right now, but also knows that it's very helpful for my Dad. He had arranged for an enormous barbecue this afternoon before my mother had a mini-breakdown and begged him to cancel. Which he did. But that doesn't mean that it's going to stop. People keep turning up unannounced, because they think it's fine to do that.

Which brings me on to the complete lack of planning. My mother says that they are only planning from one minute to the next because they don't know how my father is going to feel. Well, I think that's tough. Funnily enough, this is actually something I know something about, living with a partner who has a chronic illness. So what do we do? We plan anyway, and then we cancel. We plan and cancel. If we didn't plan anything, we would never see anyone, we would not have gone on holiday and we would not be getting married. So you cancel. It's better than feeling well and having nothing to do.

It's my grandmother's 80th birthday next week. What's the plan? What plan?

In other news, my mother is seeking professional help to help her cope. And by this I mean cleaner, someone to help her host these stupid coffees and a counsellor. I am helping in any way I can, which is washing dishes at the moment, but I will see what needs doing. Limbo is an understatement for where this house is.

P.S The genetic test that we were supposed to have results for by now hasn't been done yet. It will take another two weeks. Why? Because the insurance company was querying it and forgot to tell anyone. C'est la vie.

No comments:

Post a Comment