Sunday, 20 December 2009

It was fun while it lasted

It's been a while since I posted. Sorry about that, kids. The main reason was that everything seemed to be hunky-dory. My dad is on his second course of chemo, and has his second treatment of four tomorrow. My parents went to a spa in Germany to chill out and had a wonderful time and I salute their creativity in coming up with the idea. He was swimming in hot springs and having massages and generally felt good. Until a couple of days ago. And now my mother is going mental.

So, two things happened. First, out of boredom, I suspect, my mother was having another look at the reports from his last set of tests and found the phrase "poorly differentiated". She rang to find out what it means, and I couldn't tell her, me not being a doctor and all that. We are still not sure (help?) but I am gathering that it means that the cancer is of the more agressive type. So what else is new? But she is upset, again, because the doctors seemed to have stopped speaking to her about it. This is the price you pay for being in different countries from your doctors. Also, maybe they believe that she is overreacting.

However, my father began feeling very unwell over the past couple of days and yesterday he began running a fever. And no one seems to be able to tell us why. He is almost two weeks past his last round of chemo, so it can't be a chemo reaction and fever usually means infection (she says with intimate knowledge of medical television programs). So my dad is feeling crappy and my mother is stressed out. And I feel guilty for not being there, again, because I thought they were all alone.

But lo and behold! Little Brother has arrived! I have prepped him, but I am not sure how good he is at dealing with the emotional stuff. I think he's more of a practical I'll-get-the-groceries-in type of bloke. And I don't think he is used to seeing his mother this distressed. It's one week before I see them, but that suddenly feels like an awfully long time.

I am going to call them, right now I think, to see what's what. It's nice that they are not in the entirely wrong time zone at the moment. The way my father is feeling now may inform my decisions about what to do next. Although, the way my mum is feeling, if she is right, my father may no longer be eligible for radiation by the time they get back to the US.

And that's why I haven't posted in a while. I was holding my breath, praying that the bubble wouldn't burst. Damn Hope and it's way of making you feel...well, hopeful.

Bum and arse. Stop the rollercoaster please. I think my dad looks queasy.

1 comment:

  1. Ah, well, ignore facile comment on facebook as did not get to read whole post. This sucks. I do hope things are going to be okay in the long term. Chemo has a cumulative effect and is in essense poison ('Chemo World' is a good read, for the not faint of stomach of life as head nurse on a chemo ward until she gets cancer) which can run the body down to nothing, so a fever may not be atypical, only the blood tests and WBC counts would tell. But yeah, being the strong one while everything goes spinning away has got to be very, very hard.